The continued debate over Gay Marriage

Below is a recent article from Advocate.com. With California and it's recent acceptance of gay marriage, along with the upcoming presidential election, once again we are talking more about gay marriage. I am supportive of Sen. Obama, but I am frustrated with his stand on gay marriage. I also do not understand the view that allowing gay marriage is somehow undermining the convential family. Gays are raising children, and have been forming solid, neurtering families for years. Even though marriage is just a piece of paper, it comes down to us being told we can not have something. That somehow we are not worthy of a right allowed to ALL heterosexual citizens. On the flip side, I do think we need to work on our relationships as far as making them more solid. We do tend to rush into some relationships. I tend to think that our failures in realtionships comes from our deep need to feel loved. There was the recent study that straight women and gay men seem to have similar brain characteristics, as do gay women and straight men. How do you feel about this topic? What are your thoughts on Obama's stand on this issue?




Obama And One-Man, One-Woman Marriage
Sen. Obama reminded us this week that he believes marriage is between a man and a woman, something LGBT people might have easily forgotten over the course of the primary.
By Kerry Eleveld
An Advocate.com exclusive posted June 20, 2008
The general election has begun in earnest. Sen. Barack Obama launched his first general election ad in 18 states Thursday and spent much of the week tailoring his image to all those independents who may still find themselves torn between himself and Sen. John McCain.

Politico.com broke a story Wednesday that two Muslim women wearing head scarves were prohibited from sitting behind Sen. Obama at a rally, so as to prevent any unintended photo ops. The campaign issued a statement and contacted the women to apologize, but the message was clear: Obama can’t afford to seem too outside of the mainstream.

That sentiment also surfaced earlier this week when during an interview with ABC’s Jake Tapper, Obama uttered the words so cunningly crafted by the Christian right: marriage is between a man and a woman.

More precisely, Sen. Obama said, “I believe marriage is between a man and a woman,” shortly after being asked if he opposed same-sex marriage, to which he responded, “Yes.” This positioning is not new for Sen. Obama. He has uttered those words plenty – during a debate with Alan Keyes in 2004, on the Senate floor in 2006, even in his 2007 Human Rights Campaign candidate questionnaire.

But if LGBT people across the country bristled at the one-man, one-woman construction, they can be forgiven. After scouring the web, drawing upon memory and scanning my notes, this reporter cannot remember the senator using those words during the entire primary season from January right through until Sen. Hillary Clinton conceded the race to Obama on June 7. In fact, I don’t believe he has used them in any one of the 20-some Democratic debates.

Why now? Welcome to the general election say the pundits. One Democratic strategist and TV pundit who agreed to speak on the condition of anonymity said the language is intended to send a signal to swing state voters that Sen. Obama isn’t the crazy liberal they’ve been told he is. “That’s language that's required,” he said.

But on the bright side, he added that Sen. Obama followed his man-woman statement with: “I also think that same-sex partners should be able to visit each other in hospitals, they should be able to transfer property, they should be able to get the same federal rights and benefits that are conferred onto married couples.”

Indeed, the concept of a presidential candidate supporting civil unions was considered a serious liability as recently as 2004 when people wondered whether Howard Dean would be lambasted in a general election for signing Vermont’s civil unions bill into law.

“Obama is saying he wants the federal government to recognize whatever the states decide to sanction,” said the strategist. “That's progressive and that was unthinkable just 4 years ago.”

Paul Begala, a Democratic strategist who is not working for any campaigns, found Sen. Obama’s statement on gay marriage rather unremarkable given his previous proclamations on the issue. “I thought it sounded like the standard line for him,” said Begala, who is an Obama supporter. “And I have to say as a political consultant, this is where you don’t want to make news. It hurts your consistent position. He is where most people are, which is, we want to have civil unions, we want to have equal rights. But a lot of people get off the train on the word ‘marriage,’ and so you show respect for that.”

That may be true, but any number of gays and lesbians would like a little respect too – especially those same-sex couples who are already married in Massachusetts and California. If you cup your ears and listen closely you can almost hear them grumbling, “Btw, Sen. Obama, marriage is no longer simply between a man and a woman. At least, ours isn’t.”

Surely, the LGBT folks associated with the campaign are working feverishly behind the scenes to find a work-around for that phrase – one with the added benefit of being accurate. Only time will tell whether they prevail. Begala reminds us that this political season will be a fight for the center that we have not witnessed in about 15 years, back when Ross Perot managed to draw enough independent votes (almost 20%) to hand Bill Clinton the presidency in 1992.

“The last two elections the country was so deeply polarized, and Bush won because he realized there really were no independents left,” Begala said. “So, yes, there’s a bigger pot of independent voters. And, interestingly, each party has nominated the candidate who, in the primaries, demonstrated the strongest ability to get independent votes.”

Current struggle...

Hello everyone...

It has been a couple of weeks of ups and downs. The downs are realiziations about changes I MUST make in my life, and the hard thing is getting myself to begin on the tough journey of making needed changes.

I am FAT. Plain and simple, no bells and whistles, no ephipany needs, I am simply FAT. I love sports, and I am blessed to be good at most sports I take on. I played competitive tennis for 18 years of my life, volleyball for, gee, over 25 years, and I simply love sports. I know what I need to do in order to get fit, and I have the knowledge about exercise and diet, but something prevents me from just doing it.

I went to Gay Pride in Cincinnati this weekend and really did some soul searching. I came to realize that nobody will ever be interested in me romantically if I do not lose the weight. I would not ask me out. I saw my reflection simply in sunglasses and I was repulsed and mortified. Having the knowledge to fix this problem, so what am I lacking? Is it the committment? I am lazy? I do not think I am lazy, but I am just upset that I can not seem to make the necessary changes in my life to battle and win my battle with my weight. If you are a person who is fit, or naturally thin, you are lucky. It is a mental struggle for overweight people. Maybe for some silly reason we hold onto the fat for security.

If I had a genie come out of a bottle and give me one wish I am torn between three wishes. First of all, I would want to ask for enough money to make my family and close friends life easier, or allow them to use it to reach their dreams. I would also want to have the genie give me the power to become fit and lose weight for once in my life, and have it be a part of me for the rest of my life. The other wish I would have to consider is to cure HIV and AIDS. Wow, could I have a tougher choice. I already know the two tough ones would be helping my family and friends, and or cure HIV and AIDS.

I will be 44 this year in a few weeks. July 9th. I am getting so much older and each year means gettig fit will be more difficult. I dream of still being able to compete at sports at a high level, but what scares me is I really think my sports life is coming to an end and a quick one.

A good friend of mine just broke up with his boyfriend. I am really sorry for the pain he is feeling right now. I just want him to know it will get better. Just be thankful that you now know that the person you feel in love with never really existed. We all love you, and it will get better.

Pride this weekend in Cincinnati

Just a couple quick notes...

This Sunday, June 15th, is PRIDE here in Cincinnati.

Also, I have made an attempt to let people know about all the sports and recreation type groups we have here in Cincinnati. Their various links are all over my blog.

Just to recap...if you are interested in any of these activities, just look around here and you will find a link.

Softball ( Summer )
Volleyball ( Fall, Winter and Summer )
Bowling ( Fall & Winter )
Bike riding
Hiking
Gay Mens Choir
Gay Womens Choir
Bear events
and more....

Egypt putting men with HIV in prision....

Egypt upholds HIV-positive men's jail terms
published Friday, May 30, 2008
Prison sentences imposed on five HIV-positive men in Cairo were upheld Wednesday as part of Egypt's attempt to tighten restrictions on people living with HIV/AIDS, according to Human Rights Watch.
The men, who received three-year sentences, along with four others previously arrested, have been imprisoned because of the widespread belief that they are a danger to public health.

"To send these men to prison because of their HIV status is inhuman and unjust," Human Rights Watch's Joe Amon said in a written statement. "Police, prosecutors and doctors have already abused them and violated their most basic rights, and now fear has trumped justice in a court of law."

In the past seven months, 12 men have been arrested in Egypt under suspicion that they were HIV-positive. The Egyptian government detained all of the men for several months, tested their HIV status without their consent, and administered multiple medical examinations that have since been deemed torturous by Human Rights Watch. Three of the men were released after months in detention because their HIV test results came back negative. The other nine have all been given prison terms.

"Putting these men in prison serves neither justice nor public health," Amon said. "The Egyptian government and the country's medical profession must act to end this campaign of intolerance." (The Advocate)

Just thinking...

I hope this finds everyone in the beginnings of a great summer. Summer just happens to be my least favorite seasons. I hate the heat and humidity of summer. If it could be right around 70 - 75 degrees with no humidity, I would really, really enjoy summer more.
The new house that I live in and share with my best friend Jim is terrific. It is an older farmhouse type, and it sits on the top of a hill. The house sits on like 3-4 acres and mowing the grass up here is a chore! There alwasy seems to be a breeze blowing up here though, and that is nice. It is very quiet as you can not see the house from the street and vice versa, as you can not see the street from the house.
There is nothing worth a crap on TV during the summer. I have began to watch Kathy Griffin and her show On The D list. She just says whatever she wants and it cracks me up. She is actually fun to watch. I thought at first she might be a big annoying, but she is very entertaining. I am also becoming addicted to The BBC America channel. I enjoy watching Cash In The Attic, Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares and How Clean Is Your House?.
I am a bit apprehensive with how the Democratic Presidential Nominee, Obama, turned out. I am just convinced that he does not have the experience to run our country. He has never really given us his plan and any real specifics on what he plans on doing. I think he is nuts if he does not attempt to have Hillary as a running mate. I also believe that our country can not survive four more years with a Republican President in office. Although, it would be nice to see if McCain could actually fix all of the problems created by President George Bush. Just typing his name makes me want to throw up.
It has been a year since my big hospitalization of last year. I cant even imagine how different my life has become since then. What a difference a year makes along with the right medications and people to talk to. Having the knowledge that I have Borderline Personality Disorder has been a huge benefit. I have learned that when something goes wrong or gets tough, that it is not the end of the world. Just face the problem head on and know it is not the end of the world. People who really care about you as a person will continue to do so even when you make stupid mistakes and make bad choices.
Our big national gay volleyball tournament is coming this fall. I am exited to be working on it during the summer months. Teams will come into town on Oct. 31st, and play will be on Saturday Nov. 1 and Sunday Nov. 2, 2008. You can learn more about our volleyball tournament at www.qcc4.com.
Well, I think that is enough right now, and I hope to blog more this summer. Best wishes everyone and Happy Summer!